Slayer and Megadeth

Went to a Slayer, Megadeth and Testament concert on Monday--freakshow. That's right, it's Megadeth, not "Megadeath". They are so badass that they don't even have to spell well. The show was at the luxurious Long Beach Arena, a dying relic of 1960's toilet bowl Arena architecture. The building was in better shape than most of the crowd in any case.



Three metal bands was a bit more than I had hoped for as I really can't stand the shit, but I wasn't there for me. My friends Kris and John are true believers and my 14 year old son wanted to go as well, so here I was. I went to a Dave Matthews show two weeks ago, so this concert marked the second time in as many weeks that I went to a show out of kindness for someone I know. In any case, all three bands delivered what they promised. The crowd, 90% fat, tired looking white guys, was pumped and the pit churned. I knew enough to stay out of the pit, though I confess I was tempted. Chuck Billy, the lead singer for Testament, looked like he has had a few too many roadhouse hamburgers, but he can still play a mean air guitar, which he did throughout the show. Somebody buy him a fucking real guitar so he doesn't look like a fat guy playing guitar hero for an hour. Megadeth was better, because I actually know one of their songs. Everything you need to know about Megadeth can be assertained by looking at the home page of their website.
http://www.megadeth.com/home.php
Dave Mustain and his boys try to look like they kill people and eat the intestines, but they never quite pull it off. Mustain's claim to fame is that he once fell asleep (read passed out) on his arm and damaged his nerves so severely that doctors told him he would never play again. But he said, "fuck you man, I gotta rock" and through sheer will power regained his ability to bore the shit out of anyone with a shred of musical taste--which I now grant myself. In one song, "Symphony of Destruction" Mustain compares himself to the Pied Piper. By extension the people who buy his shit, or "follow" him are, metaphorically, rats--'nuff said.
Slayer sucked more than Megadeth, though the guy who pucked all over the floor in front of us between sets didn't seem to mind. Maybe I was just done, but Slayer didn't have a single redeeming musical quality. They could play loud and fast. How's that?
In fairness, this probably reads like a review of a steakhouse in a PETA publication, but there is nothing really redeeming about this kind of music. To each his own, but I really don't need to listen to songs about serial killers, the devil, or suicide--I think about these subjects too much as it is. Somewhere, among the tattoos of demonic goats, vomit drenched shoes, and NAZI symbolism, a lot of angry white people were trying to let out some pent up aggression. Perhaps metal is cathartic, but I'm not that pissed to begin with.